My Bongadongs Are on Fire

Bank Holiday Weekend and it's Raining
Unfortunately it's not raining men, ho hum.  I disappeared slightly there into imagining men falling from the sky, especially ones that look like Hugh Jackman.  I digress, what's this blog about.  Right I'm back, back into the room.

It's been raining, and I'm on holiday, so you'd be confused as to why I might feel so chipper about the rain? There are two huge reasons as to why I'm so chipper about the rain.
1. I'm indoors studying to finish my homework to become a qualified hypnotherapist and;
2. Running in cooler damp weather is much more pleasant than feeling like I'm running in my own portable oven!

There is something wonderfully cosy, being sat indoors, looking at the rain hit the window, whilst sat in my scomfiest clothes (scruffy and comfy clothes, you work it out), hot cup of tea and maybe the odd biscuit or two.

And it's wonderfully invigorating to be outside running in the fresh air, being able to breathe, not feeling like I've swollen up like a piece of old meat left out in the sun.  So last Monday's run with the Lordshill Road Runners felt really, really tough.  It was not more than I'd run before so should have been a piece of cake but maybe it was complacency about my mental well being towards my running. Last week I was on a running high after running five miles, a bit of a swagger ensued, a bit of I can do anything approach and maybe that was my downfall.

Hypnosis for Running  www.hypnosisfordownload.com/hypnosis-for-running/ (now under a £10), had a hypnosis session about relaxing into running, being out there, engaging with what it was like and this helped my mental attitude to believe in myself to run further and to be able to do it easily, which I did.  A swift kick, momentarily dazed the arrogant apprentice runner in me and so I got back on the horse so to speak!

parkrun
Saturday is now parkrun day, and this Saturday felt tough, the Fair was in town and sprawled across the common so a new route around the common was organised which appeared to be mostly uphill! Oh My God, uphill, and hot, it's so not fair (no pun intended), stamp my feet and throw my toys out of the pram.  Anyway much to my surprise, this was a personal best for me.  Woo hoo, I may be nearly last but I'm still improving, a little jig about, and some imaginary high fives in the air.

No More Drinking
Well not before an early morning run, as not drinking, a good nights kip and a bit of hypnosis do me the world of good and improve my run.

My Longest Run Yet
Bank Holiday Monday saw the dawning of my longest run to date, and I was ready for it.  I'd slept well, I'd forgone the obligatory glass of wine and I'd done some hypnosis right before I left the house.  And I went, and went, and went on my 8.92k route.  There were no Paula Radcliffe moments and there was no stopping, not once. Man I was chuffed to bits and knackered.  There was just one problem.

My Bongadongs Were on Fire
I had noticed from previous runs a little chaffing on the Bongadongs, on the underside but nothing to write home about (I mean the chaffing).  Until now.  <Insert expletive as loud and as rude as you can handle> it felt like someone had a red hot branding iron and was running a line across the underside of my boobs and then pouring on some vinegar, or salt, or some other unholy pain inducing chemical.  All the while I was desperately using my imagination to think of other things, like 'my, my feet feel incredibly comfortable', whilst they pounded towards home and relief. Or 'wouldn't it be nice to kneel over two buckets of icy water and plop my boobs into them', oh, hang on a minute that wouldn't be so comfortable either.  So my mind swung from OOoowwww, to ridiculous imaginings to divert my thoughts from the pain until at last the front door was in site.

Veteran Runners - Advice Please
I need your help, I'm sure there's something I can do to avert this torture happening again and avoid looking like I've stepped out of 50 Shades of Grey, so please give me an olive branch, let me know what I need to do to stop it happening again, apart from stop running of course.

The Time Snatcher

The Time Snatcher, unlike the Child Snatcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang comes in a huge variety of guises, some I'm prepared for, some I'm not, and some have been dressed up so beautifully with excuses I don't even notice them.
Over the last few weeks, my time has been snatched, which has eroded my running opportunities.  A time snatcher I am never prepared for is 'The Migraine' referred to previously.  I do believe however, that I allowed the Time Snatcher of excuses, to keep me stretched out on the sofa rather than go to parkrun. I did manage to drag my sorry arse out on Sunday and later on that week completed my first 5.2k early morning run which I was ecstatic about. Give me that High Five.

The next weekend was replete with Time Snatchers beyond my control but wonderful.  I had volunteered to Marshal at parkrun and planned to run the route afterwards. Que family-in-law visit from France.  Me and my partner don't see them very often and they were straight off the chunnel coming to have a wonderful artery clogging English Breakfast, so a quick dash back after marshalling to see everyone and stuff my face.

Sunshine was even a bloody Time Snatcher - I used to have a garden, now, mostly it resembles the garden of that neighbour, there's always one, who's garden needs a good tidy up! In the short dry spell gardening called, all afternoon, due to the jungle that was there. But late night visitors (long story) looking for a place to stay and consequently staying until lunchtime on Sunday resulted in another morning gone. And then there are the other chores that are required I had to do the weekly shop, washing etc. Excuses for not running pretty high this last week.

So in a week I had managed just one run. Bugger. It's hard not to let a little bit of panic creep in, how will I get fit enough to run 10 miles if these Time Snatchers keep creeping up on me. Shiv (those of you who have an old Nokia and used predictive text and were not averse to the odd profanity will get this.  If you never had a Nokia, ask someone!)

So, shiv.  How do I get back on it. Focus, flexibility, sheer bloody mindedness and hypnosis.

The Time Snatcher Kicked into Touch, Four Runs in a Week
Monday night with the Lordshill Road Runners, Thursday 6.20am start a nearly 5k.  I say nearly, as nature called and I had to cut short my run to avoid a 'Paula Radcliffe'. Friday a short run, just a mile and then up and down a little hill near me six times.  Friday night was a late one but my sheer bloodymindedness got me out of bed and off to parkrun, where my time was slower than two weeks earlier.  Shiv, shiv, shiv!

Another Week Starts With Determination
Monday - Lordshill Road Runners again, we did about 6 - 7k around the common, without stopping, just a small group of us and it was great.  We all felt fabulous and awfully proud of ourselves.

Que Time Snatcher! Late night call, well I say late, it was midnight, which isn't that late but when you are planning a 6am run, a midnight call is late, and then I couldn't get back to sleep for aaaages.  Arrhhhh.  Anyone who knows me well, will know that me without sleep is the equivalent of swapping my head and brain (Worzel Gummidge style) for Victor Meldrew.  When the alarm went off at six it was swiftly turned off and replaced with a new time of 7.  A missed run.

Hypnosis stops Time
Throughout all of my running journey I've been listening to Hypnosis for Running and even though I haven't been able to fit in as much as I would like.  I am improving . . . slowly.  I've been listening to my hypnosis about relaxing into my running every day this week and so I had renewed vigour for parkrun on Saturday and I wanted to run more.  So I mapped out an extra mile to do before or after parkrun.  Yes, 'crazy' I hear you cry. But I had an innermost desire to do more. Whether it's the Olympics, the hypnosis or my stubbornness I don't know.  I just knew that I would.

Saturday morning arrived and off I trekked to the common getting there early with plenty of time to stick in an extra mile. It was decision time.  I had a hot black coffee, the radio and a comfy seat and big arse  (I am referring to mine) to sit on, in the car.  Mmmm. The coffee and car didn't win.  By jove, I got my arse out of that comfy position and ran that extra mile.  Before the start of parkrun at 9.  On a Saturday. Get me.

Running Support and I don't mean for the Bongadongs
Then I ran parkrun.  It was a bloody fabulous run.  There was a young lady who decided to keep pace with me the whole way round.  We didn't speak, we were both listening to our music, but we kept pace with each other and it was a nice feeling, wow, another human whom I don't know just keeping me company in silence as we did the route.  As we came to the finish line she pushed herself to get through faster. She had more than I did and so for a moment I was running alone.  It was only a moment though as two of my chums who came for the first time on Saturday and are still faster than me (Goddammit, and who had already finished, double Goddammit) ran up the course and flanked me running in the last little bit. Sometimes it's the smallest things that people do for you that can give you the warmest glow.

So all in all I had run four miles that morning, my furthest yet and the best was yet to come.

I eagerly awaited the results from parkrun.  Keen to see whether a good nights kip can improve your speed and as it happens, it can. 1 minute 40 seconds faster than last Saturday's parkrun and 21 seconds faster than my first parkrun. Bloody hell. I was improving. I spent the day as euphoric as Timmy Mallet discovering Specsavers.

No More Time Snatchers, Just Body Snatchers
I had planned to weigh myself or measure myself and provide regular updates but you know what, I don't need to.  I know I'm getting stronger and little wobbly bits are being snatched away slowly but surely, and my clothes are fitting just a little more comfortably.  But more importantly, I'm liking myself more and more with every run that I take.

Roll on the 8k run  this week with Burnin by Baby Bumps in my ears.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vMAwiXgjWY